June 4th, 2019
I’m sitting here in the computer room across from my mother’s room. I can hear her whimpering, but not asking for help. Let me check…
Okay, today is a day where she is too stiff and tried to pull on her pants. So, I just helped her get them over her feet while she sits in a chair I bought for this reason and she does the rest. A typical morning has her dressing across the room and myself in the computer room in case she needs me.
The first week in June, 2017 my father went into heart surgery to correct one of three blockages. He was able to be active at 91, but the Dr worried it would lead to a heart attack. This is the easiest of the three, the second is also do-able, but the third may not be. First things First.
He passed 4 months later, and I moved in with my mother. I went back to work at Microsoft in January of 2018, but left the first week in August after computing and splitting my time between my mother, the house and property and work which was getting a distant third in priority. So its been 10 months since I retired.
Taking care of mom is much harder than expected. I’m steeling myself for worse to come, but I had hoped to have years where we could travel and do things, but that was really just 6 months. Early in 2019 she got ill, broke her hand and while both got better it left her a level down in mobility and strength. Its hard to imagine taking a car trip or doing any travel now. Today a PT comes in to work with her, the first of two months worth so I have hopes to reverse the trend. I’m also trying to have us both eat better as well.
This is the hardest point in my life and I feel like I’m failing every day.
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